If big feelings of anxiety, anger or shame are getting in your way, I can help you understand them better and learn to manage them well in the future. Imagine what your life could be like if you felt in control of your emotions, instead of being bossed around by them.
Anxiety (Worry, Fear)
Our fast paced world tends to encourage anxiety, and we all feel it from time to time. In fact anxiety has an essential role in our lives. Without it, we might walk out into heavy traffic or let wonderful opportunities pass us by. But sometimes it becomes an obstacle, or gets out of control. You may need help managing your anxiety if any of the following are true:
- Your fears or worries prevent you from doing things that you really want to do.
- You have an inner critic, that frequently tells you negative things about yourself.
- Your body is always tense. It's hard for you to physically relax.
- Your mind frequently runs through the same negative thoughts over and over, and you don't know how to stop it.
- You avoid certain things, so you don't have to experience the tension or worry that they bring up.
Like all big emotions, shame has it's positive role. It's a part of how we learn who we want to be, and to cultivate humility. Shame can also show up after bad experiences, when it's easier to accept a sense of responsibility than to accept that we don't/didn't have control. When shame becomes a big part of your self image, it brings with it an overall sense of being inadequate, inferior or unworthy - like you just don't fit in the world. You may need help managing your shame if any of the following are true:
- You feel like most people reject or are critical of you (or would if they knew you)
- You feel like something is fundamentally bad or wrong about you
- You are very prone to embarrassment, and feel it more than others seem to
- Your shame makes it difficult to get what you want in relationships
- Your shame keeps you from doing things that you might otherwise enjoy
Anger is a powerful emotion that helps us take action and set boundaries. And when it gets out of control, it can damage relationships or even put us in danger. You may need help managing your anger if any of the following are true:
- You used to have less angry outbursts
- You often do or say things in anger that seem out of character for you
- You often do or say things in anger that create problems for you with other people
- Your anger sometimes seems to come from out of nowhere, or surprises you with its intensity
- Other people have expressed concern about your anger